Trusting

For Friday, September 14, 2007
Proverbs 25:19

Trusting in a treacherous man in time of trouble
is like a bad tooth or a foot that slips.

We must trust others. Walking down the street, we trust drivers not to swerve into us. Ordering our food, we trust the cook not to contaminate our dish. Unconcious trusting is necessary simply to go through an ordinary day. We raise the trust level as we conciously are aware of the role others play. Thus, the laborer trusts his supervisor to give directives that will not lead to injury. The employee trusts his employer not to fire him without cause. Likewise, the employer and supervisor trust their workers to do their best and not undermine them.

But these common day experiences still require a measure of alertness. It is imprudent to walk down a street when you see cars swerving dangerously. You ought not to eat in a restaurant that has been cited for food poisoning. Employers and employees may take advantage of one another.

Where alertness is most needed is where the risks are greatest - putting your savings into the hands of an investor; following counsel about your future; giving your heart to another. Pay attention to the person you are trusting. Learn his reputation. It is the gift of treacherous persons to appear trustworthy. All the more reason then to learn his past.

The world is dangerous and we must be wary of whom we trust. But all the more reason to give thanks to God that the greatest risk of all - the welfare of our souls - is placed in the most trustworthy of hands - God the Father (John 10:29). He who controls our destiny is the one who will always do what is best and see that all things work out for our good (Romans 8:28). The world is dangerous, but the Creator and Ruler of the world is good and sovereign. We may not be able to know who and when to trust, but we can always trust the one who holds us in his hands.

False Witness

For Thursday, September 13, 2007
Proverbs 25:18

A man who bears false witness against his neighbor
is like a war club, or a sword, or a sharp arrow.

Note God's standard of justice. To slander another person is equal to striking him with a weapon. To lie with the intent to damage a neighbor is an act of violence. Think about this the next time you are tempted to "exaggerate" the truth or fail to tell the whole truth.

Like the effect of a weapon, the damage lingers and may be permanent. The lie spreads and the neighbor's reputation cannot be reclaimed. Or if it is, the damage against his well-being has already been made.

Consider the term "false witness." It infers that you are a witness, and as such to be trusted. This is not passing on gossip. It is making a claim that you witnessed the deed or the evidence. How much more then will you be held accountable before God.

"But he lied about me!" All the more reason not to resort to the same tactic and thus lend credence to his slander. All the more reason to carefully speak the truth, even speak the truth in love to the honor of Christ whom you represent. Remember that God sees and knows perfectly all that takes place, even the motives of the heart. It is for him to justify. Our responsibility is to be a "true witness" for the cause of Christ.

Respecting Boundaries

For Wednesday, September 11, 2007
Proverbs 25:17

Let your foot be seldom in your neighbor's house,
lest he have his fill of you and hate you.

A common mistake in social relations is to presume too much upon courtesy and neighborliness. A good neighbor will be courteous and friendly. But that does not mean he desires to have the kind of close friendship which allows us to step into his house at all occasions. A colleague may be friendly with us, but that does not mean that he welcomes us to stop into his office or at his desk frequently to chat.

There are relational boundaries which an observant person sees and respects. Even in close friendships, there are still boundaries, and we are to respect them. That is how we build trust and develop closer friendships. If I know you will respect my boundaries, I am more likely to remove them for you. If I see you crossing over them, I will keep myself at more of a distance.

A friendship is not measured by how often one may "step into the house" of a neighbor. Rather, it is measured by the blessing of the time that friends are together. Like the person in the previous proverb who gets sick from too much honey, so a friendship may sicken from over exposure. A healthy friendship allows space between friends so that when they are together the time is savored.

Enough

For September 11, 2007
Proverbs 25:16

If you have found honey, eat only enough for you,
lest you have your fill of it and vomit it.

The lesson is "moderation in all things." Apply this to food. What are you eating now, not because you need it, but because you cannot restrain yourself? Honey is healthy food until you eat too much of it. And as with any food, eating too much of anything will cause your body to react. The result is that the very thing that was good and which gave pleasure turned into an enemy against your health and pleasure.

There is a purpose for exercising restraint, which is precisely to enhance pleasure, not reduce it. The purpose who learns to savor food by not overeating, enjoys much more the eating experience. To indulge in food is to deny ourselves the full enjoyment of food.

This lesson applies to every experience. The more we indulge, the less we savor. The more repetitive an experience, the less satisfying it becomes. And worse, the experience takes control of us, forcing us to insist upon more while receiving less satisfaction.

If you have found "honey," take delight in it and restrain how much you eat. Enjoy it fully by not getting bloated by it. Then it will give you further delight in your memory and the next time you taste. Learn to savor your experiences by measuring your intake. It will heighten your senses and enrich your memories.

Patient and Softly

For Monday, September 10, 2007
Proverbs 25:15

With patience a ruler may be persuaded,
and a soft tongue will break a bone.

Water, with patience, will quietly break a rock. A wise person, with patience, speaking softly can win over the minds of others and thus accomplish his will. How does he accomplish this?

As a patient man, he takes the time to observe and to listen. He takes the time to understand the person he persuades. We may waste many words arguing our point not having realized that the argument we are making has no relevance to the hearer. We also, in our haste, unknowingly work against ourselves, because we are actually offending our hearer.

The patient man also understands the power of the soft tongue. Words spoken softly may take longer to achieve their affect, but they have the advantage of softening the resolve of the hearer. If you speak to me loudly or harshly, you cause me to raise my defenses against you. Even if what you say is right, I want you to be wrong. But if you speak to me softly, I will give you a hearing, and though I reject your counsel then, I am inclined to mull over what you have said and to be open when you patiently choose the time to speak to me again.

Patience and a soft tongue make a powerful combination. Think about this the next time you want to "make your point" by fussing at whomever you are frustrated with. It is not the intensity of your emotion that will win over, but rather the patient, soft word spoken with wisdom and in love.